Personal Fire Extinguisher?

I have recently discovered that no matter how hard you try to escape the heat while out doors, even with shade it is almost next to impossible.  And so then I thought to myself, back in the day when Corduroy pants were in style, if you happened to live out here and wore them during the heat of the day, if for some reason you found yourself with a need to run or sprint, the friction caused by the lines of the pants would result in crotch combustion!  Why in the crotch area?  Well, I don't know about the average person, but my legs are thickest just before they reach my hips!  Just sayin'!

Although I do not wear anything in the Corduroy fashion, I have decided that I need to find a personal fire extinguisher on the off chance that I myself should experience spontaneous combustion!  Hell, between the make up and hair spray, walking around in the heat of the day may be the perfect recipe for some form of explosive material.

And then there are the bugs..... ewww!  Okay, so honestly I am not a big girlie-girl when it comes to creepie crawlers, in fact as a young child I had snakes, lizards and a tarantula to occupy my time.  However, in California our bugs are of normal, small size.  I came across a wasp, jet black with red wings, that sucker was the size of a flippin helicopter!  Trust me, I know people say not to swat and run, but damn!  My arms were flailing all over the place and I almost ran over one of the dogs in my attempt to escape.

Last night, as I was updating a blog I had a proof reading moth that sat on my monitor during most of the typing.  Obviously it wasn't too thrilled with what I had to write because the thing shot off my monitor, came directly towards me and I almost tipped over backwards in my chair.  After I composed myself and stopped laughing, I thought to myself, it was just a moth!  So I named him Jet.  Oh, the lizard is Charlie and he just kind of owns the right side of my moms yard.